Hardhat Liner
The Wit And Humor of NCIS Season One
One of the many reasons NCIS is such a popular TV series is the banter between the characters and the witty one liner put downs. All these examples come from way back in NCIS Season One,before Ziva had appeared on the show and Tim Mc Ghee still wasn`t a regular cast member and the main female agent was Caitlin Todd (Kate).
Dennis: NCIS never heard of it
Gibbs: That`s embarrasing.
Dennis: NCIS anything like CSI?
Tony: Only if you`re dyslesic.
Tony: Was it something I said?
Gibbs: Not yet.
Gonzales: If I was rogue, you think I’d be sitting in this office sweating my ass off, Agent Todd?
Kate: I don’t know. Let me see your ass.
Abby: I like that commercial where the guy puts Super Glue in his hardhat, then glued his head to the beam and hung there. I tried that with my little brother.
Ducky: I sense this anecdote doesn’t have a storybook ending.
Abby: It does if you like your stories to end with bald seven-year-olds. He still gets mad when I call him Kojak.
Gibbs: I do not believe in coincidences.
Abby: What about that rock formation on the moon that looks like Jay Leno’s chin?
Tony: Well, you think I could pass for a marine?
Gibbs: I don’t know, let’s shave your head and find out
Gibbs: Hey, DiNozzo, kinda reminds me of your apartment – except for that minty fresh urine smell.
Tony: For your information, I have a maid now.
Gibbs: You can afford a maid?
Tony: It’s amazing what you can do when you don’t have to pay three alimonies. (pause) Ow!
Kate: Are you sure you know where you’re going?
Gibbs: I used to do this for a living.
Tony: They had maps back then?
Kate: You were a boy scout?
Tony: Cub.
Kate: What did they kick you out for?
Tony: Trying to score Brownie points.
Kate: Do all Marines build boats?
Tony: Only the ones who’ve been married a few times.
Kate: Why’s that?
Tony: The rest of them can afford to buy one
Kate: Tony, you are so lucky you didn’t have sisters growing up.
Tony: Why’s that?
Kate: Because youd never have reached puberty. Of course, one could argue you still haven’t reached it.
Fornell: This guy’s been a sleeper his whole life.
Gibbs: I’d like to put him in a coma.
Kate: Never put anything on videotape that you don’t want to be seen.
Tony: Just ask Paris Hilton.
Abby: ‘Is there anything you can’t find?’
McGee: ‘A way to shut up DiNozzo’
About the Author
E D Mealing is a contributor to the NCIS FANS Website at http://ncisfans.yolasite.com Where you will find lots more information about the cast and characters of NCIS. The website contains biographies of the all the NCIS cast. Plus videos,a complete episode guide, all the latest NCIS news and links to other NCIS sites.
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